Chunder Everywhere!

Cups of tea in the evening are pleasant, aren't they? Especially when accompanied with the partially digested delicacies provided by my cat.

Don't get me wrong, she's a lovely little feline, but when I settled down for the apprentice yesterday evening, I did not expect the pleasant odour that I received within my nostrils, swiftly followed by the horrified and highly disgusted noises from my mother of 'EUGH.' and 'Oh my God, whyyyyy?!'
Two minutes later she had hobbled into the living room, proclaiming, 'Florence. Has been sick. All over the dining room floor.'
Yay. And guess who had it their heart to volunteer to clean it up?
So,
As I walked into the beautifully decorated room housing my dining table and some various other unused furnishings, the pungent smell of half-digested cat food filled my unwelcoming nostrils. Oh my giddy Aunt. I can feel the remains of my dinner surfacing as I view this splendour.

Mother was not indeed lying when she said the cat had chundered everywhere, as I found out when faced with the four lusciously sized piles of solid and slimy sick, ranging from diameters of around 3cm to about 10cm. Yummy Yummy.

Just imagine it, me kneeling over these perfectly and expertly formed piles of vomit, retching and spluttering with the aid of nothing but a meagre scrap of kitchen role.

Having succeeded between sicky burps in gathering all of the chunks, I stand up guardedly, and nearly fall again, as I have trod right in the chunder. It begins to soak through my sock and I nearly drop my kitchen rolled prize.
This is it, I really am going to add to the pile now. I manage to keep it back, however and proceed to deposit it in the bin where it will rot for eternity muhahaha.

Oh, I am so classy.